Discovering Love for Self is Sacred Work


I’ve wanted self-love and fought self-loathing for most of my life. Both have been hard to experience, but for different reasons.

Self-loathing does its devious work undercover. I can’t say that I’ve ever really known, consciously, that I loathe myself; but, I can say that I’ve struggled with finding myself ‘deserving’. The self-loathing part was undercover; what showed on the surface was a lack of confidence and being afraid to show myself to the world. It was only fairly recently that I came to feel the stuck emotion of self-loathing. It had been buried deep down for a long, long time.

Self-love has always seemed out of reach. For me, affirmations never worked. It has always been much harder for me to love myself than to love others. And it wasn’t until I began to look at the deepest and darkest places within me that the light of love within began to really shine. It was then that I realized I could never really love another until I discovered what it was to love myself.

Doing the work to find true self-love can be daunting, yet it is sacred work. It is deep, soulful and compassionate work.

When Jenn Gibson, founder of Roots of She, asked me to contribute to her new e-course called Self-love Warriors, I felt called to add whatever I could to what she was creating. One of the greatest things about Jenn’s creation is that it can be experienced by yourself or in community, or both. Learning to love oneself isn’t easy, yet it is important work. I believe Jenn has created something that is going to help many of us deepen this sacred work.

In the course, I’m the break-out guide for the fourth week, honoring the sacred feminine. Coming to know, in a deeply profound way, that the sacred is within you is one of the most beautiful ways you can honor and love yourself, other women and all of life.

I am an affiliate for the Self-love Warrior course, meaning that when someone uses the link I’ve provided here to purchase Jenn’s course, I receive a percentage. That being said, I feel it’s going to be a great course. Whether you decide to join us or not, I hope you dive in and open yourself to the deep well of love inside your own heart.

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9 Replies to “Discovering Love for Self is Sacred Work”

  1. We are on the same sacred wavelength. Self-love and self-loathing are both on my mind lately …

    Thank you for sharing this. I am going to check it out! Namaste.

  2. Thanks Julie, this has been up for me lately to. I’m reminded of a question Adyashanti asked “Isn’t the love, fulfillment and peace that you are seeking externally not already here now?” Sometimes it seems hard to let that love in, to let go of my stories that try to prevent it. Lots of love to you. Charlie

  3. I have been working on both for a few years now. It is hard work (though fulfilling), especially since I didn’t realize exactly how much I disliked myself until I discovered reiki. I thought the way I thought about / spoke to myself was normal. Though it occurs to me that maybe it is normal, just not a normal that I wish for any of us.

  4. I believe that mastering self-love is the key to significant living. There are so many others out there with whom we insist on constantly comparing ourselves. So many attributes we wish we had, or characteristics we wish we could imbibe. We would do well to realize that we are enough by ourselves. “There is only one you for all time. Fearlessly be yourself.”

  5. Deep bow and blessing to you, dear Julie, for naming this monster and its antidote. I know well self loathing and name it often. Self love is a “work in progress”. I agree with your comment to Pamela, these times of deep shifts need for us to name and know.

  6. I’ve asked myself for such a long time, why is it so hard to love myself? I think it takes time and like you said, really going deep into the soul and figuring things out. I’m still on this journey, but find it so refreshing to accept myself and believe in myself for the first time in my life.

  7. Julie, thank you for this. I tweeted this course to a friend this morning because it reminded me of her. Then, when I saw your post, I realized I needed it for me. I am launching my first e-course in a month and will need all the self-love I can get over the next four weeks. Just signed up.

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